God and Me
I am not always the guy who experiences God’s intimate presence on a daily basis. I do my best to stay faithful, reading his written words and getting to know his character and my place in a large, spiritual story. I take steps trusting that God, in his mercy, would correct me if I was in error. But it is not as if I wake up and always have an insatiable desire to submit everything to him and relinquish my comfort to love like he does; rather, I act often out of faith that my joy will follow my faithfulness because my life is guided by God’s commands, which I know are good for me.
I tend to make a pattern of resisting confrontation when possible, but God has truly forced me to rely on him in a series of dilemmas these past few years in Seattle. First was God pulling me–and then my parents–out to Washington to begin an entirely new chapter in my life. Next came choosing between two churches and where to dedicate my time to ministry, declining a leadership position at the Inn to pursue Mars Hill for its theology and depth of life with Jesus. Third, I struggled for some time to find a direction with classes and a major; ultimately, God was faithful in admitting me to the UW School of Business, and I’m still trying to discover a passion, but I’ve learned some valuable things along the way. There I stood, mere days before finals this December, with a series of weighty things on my mind. I reached a crossroads once again.
A New Opportunity
The tension began two weeks before finals of fall quarter.
A friend from UW and Mars Hill introduced me to a potential opportunity to intern at Mars Hill in the Finance department. Among other stipulations, this would give me some accounting/finance experience I hadn’t yet acquired at my 1.5 years at Wells Fargo. That’s a plus. Having commitments to play drums each week at MHUD and finish the next two quarters of school, I could not pull off all four things, so either my schedule would need to radically change, or I could not pursue this opportunity that, for some reason, was sticking out to me as an open door to walk through. Potential minus. Once again–tension.
I reached out to many friends for prayer in this time and could feel God releasing stress slowly throughout my circumstances. I received good counsel, whether it was to praise God’s name regardless of whether he gives or takes away [Job 1:21] or simply to offer every decision up in prayer to the omniscient and sovereign God, trusting that his wisdom frees us of anxiety [Phil 4:6-7].
My Decision & Announcement
Time was of the essence; finals needed to be studied for, the application deadline was approaching, and Wells Fargo would need to be notified if I were to quit. Decision time: stay with steady Wells Fargo, my employer of 18 months and foundation of corporate experience, or quit the job to pursue something short-term with the church that changed my life, praying my skills would lend themselves well to what I’ve been training to do in my classes? As some of you know, I felt that God led me to chose the latter–I accepted the internship with Mars Hill in the Finance department and will be ceasing to work for Wells Fargo on December 31. I appreciate any prayer for this new phase and we will see what God does with the next few months leading to graduation. There may be staff openings in Finance through that time, or this might just be a time when I can serve my church well and learn a lot–regardless, I want to continue in faithful obedience and get to know Jesus better through all the processes.